Dear Veer Beer,

 

When you’re betrayed and hurt by someone you love, trust, and believe in, it’s like the worse feeling in the world.  Your heart drops.  You lose your breath for a quick second.  Your eyes get watery, you get chills, and you’re in denial for a brief moment. The, you realize it’s all bad and you get to wondering why me, what did I do and is it my fault.  It’s never an easy thing to cope with or get over.  I’m sorry for you having to go through such drama.  It does appear as though that _________ behavior was extremely selfish, idiotic, inconsiderate, and down right wrong.  Cheating is wrong and pretty much the worse thing you can do in a relationship.  But there are some occasions were it’s needed or were some deserve it.  However, I do not feel that in your case it was needed or deserved.  To me, it seemed like the opportunity presented itself, and he felt that he could get away with it and “what you don’t know won’t hurt you.”

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But sooner or later what you do in the dark always comes to light.  Plus, most men tend to think that we can do whatever we want and get away with it anyways whether it be wrong or right.  It’s like we just know that we are going to be forgiven, like we got changes.  But some of us fail to realize that what comes around goes around, and it’s not so fun when we are the one’s getting played.  At the same time, not all women are spiteful in that way.  However, they still manage to find other ways to get back at us or put it all in our face.  It takes time to forgive and forget, but when it comes to this type of situation, you can never forget, but you can forgive.  You always find yourself second guessing yourself and your partner for the simple fact that you don’t wanna make the same mistakes you made or play the fool again.  Which is why I pretty much avoid relationships.

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It takes a lot of effort from both sides for it to work out.  There’s always gonna be drama sooner or later, always going to be temptations and always going to be ups and downs.  No relationship is perfect, but yet we strive for perfection in everything we do.  What it all comes down to is, is he or she worth all of the bullshit, all the effort, all the drama, all the ups and downs?  That is something you must figure out for yourself.  Agree with yourself with what you will and will not tolerate, and stick with it.  Stand firm for what you believe in cuz you must love yourself completely in order to have a righteous relationship with another person.  Otherwise, you are always going to be used and abused or taken advantage of.  You must remember that you are grown, so need to play little kid games or go fit for tat.  It’s about what’s best for you mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  That’s for you to decide, not anyone else.  You know your worth so never play yourself short or let anyone else make you think differently.  I hope you were able to make all your decisions clear minded and to fit your wants and needs.  Just be cautious, and learn from your mistakes.  Don’t let them remain mistakes, turn them into life lessons, and educate yourself as you would in school.  Stay on top of things, and don’t allow things to get to a point were you’re second guessing anything.  Do what you feel you need to do in order to obtain your happiness.  If you feel you both need counseling, then seek it.  If it’s more time apart, take it.  It’s hard and complicated to figure out, but it’s necessary.  I hope that __________ can get it together for you and himself.  It’s a start for him to seek outside advice, and it seems like it’s helping.  Just try to make sure he keeps it going in case he ever finds himself in another bind.  Madre sure you two keep clear communication between each other.  For that will always help.  Remember, instead of settling for less, settle for what’s best, babes.

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You can always keep holding back with your true feelings and emotions, but eventually, it will come out sooner or later.  All it takes is a big fight or perhaps some alcohol.  At the same time, why keep touching yourself and making yourself suffer when he did that to you already.  Progress is the best thing after such an incident, and I can understand why you wouldn’t want to regress.  But some things are better left unsaid then said.  However, there are some things that need to be said in order for both sides to truly move forward, progress, and truly forgive.  It takes a two way street, not one.  It makes no sense for one of you to move on and forward while the other pretends to, all the while you’re hurting inside.  Your foundation is bound to crumble if you don’t create more solidness.  Sometimes, you have to take hat gamble and lay all the cards out on the table face up.  Certain things can leave to faith to decide.  Certain things you can change, but there are occasions were you must take that chance and hope faith prevails.  Just believe in it, and keep it.

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Well cuz-n sorry for taking so long to get back.  Sometimes the days are real long and tiring.  Hope that you’re still in good and high sprits when this gets to you.  Hope you and __________ are still doing good and better, so stay up.  Hope you have fun at the Charger games you will attend this year.  Stay strong, cuz-n.  Keep up your faith, keep your head up, and stay pushing forward through the thick and thin.  Look forward to your next letter.  Love and miss you lots.

 

Your littlest cuzn,

 

Nando